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Wednesday, August 22, 2012

My Adoption Story, A Miracle from God

by Doni Hall

Of course I don't remember, I was a baby!
But I was told numerous times, I was adopted.

That story of the stork carrying me to my mother and father was a part of my upbringing. I even have an oil painting of it made by a friend of my mothers'... a  purple stork carrying a baby through the air, but the hair of the baby was left undone until I arrived. As soon as that dear friend of my mother's heard, she painted the baby's hair dark brown.

The story I was told is that their phone rang and announced that my new mother and father could come pick me up, that I had arrived and was ready! Well, they couldn't move fast enough. After they arrived home with me, my father went next door and knocked on the neighbor's door. "Come and see what we have!".
"Naw, it's probably just a puppy" the crotchety neighbor said.
"Just come see!" my father replied. So the older neighbors went to see.

Stories like that were fascinating to me...I couldn't hear enough! As a small child I remember always asking to hear more. I had always been told I was adopted, so the word was always a part of me.

Eight months after my birth, my mother and father had a baby themselves...my sister was only 8 months younger than me. We were so close in age people thought we were twins. When asked, my mother would smile and say, "no, one is adopted". Well, they would smile and pat my sister on her blond head, and walk away. Remember, I'm dark headed and looked very much like my mother and father!

I can remember when the realization of the term 'adopted' truly registered in my young mind. I had a DIFFERENT mother and father than those who were raising me. More questions came to my mind. Who was my mother? Who was my father? Could 'so-and-so' be my real mother? What about ____? No, they were not my real mother....or my Birth mother as I learned to refer to her.
The mystery of my life had begun, and it wasn't to end any time soon.
And it kept me in its grip.

I have to say that my story is a miracle. So many things over the years occurred where I see God's hand...where He kept me and where He blessed me.

1964 was a year that started out cold and snowy where I was born. The day I was born it snowed.
It was also a year that was during the time where an unwed mother was a serious social no-no.

My younger years were full of playtime with my sister, and later a brother. Our home was a typical house in a neighborhood and my schooling was normal. But my mind and my heart thought countless times of an unknown girl who was my mother. I was told her age was 18 and that my birth father was a year older. I only knew that she couldn't keep me. Still, I wanted to know more.

The questions multiplied as I grew older. Whenever I heard the word adoption, I was all ears. In 7th grade I did my research paper on Adoption and found out that there were different types of adoption...Private as well as Open, etc.
More questions....mine was a private adoption through an agency in our large city.
I figured that I'd never be able to find my 'real' parents until I was older and could do so myself.

My first year of High School brought about a number of changes. One was my hearing the Gospel!
God, before the earth was made, chose me to be one of His ADOPTED children! I'd never seen that in the Bible before, but there it was.
I saw that those He loved and chose before the foundation of the world, He gave to Christ.
"For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God. For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. The spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit that we are the children of God."
Romans 8:14-16

I graduated from High School in 1982, went to college and got a degree in 1986, immediately got married and the next year had my first son. Out on my own, I still sought to find answers to my questions. Would I EVER find my birth mother???

By the time I had my second son, the questions were overwhelming me. Here I was with two wonderful sons... and I wanted to know if they looked like me, did they look like my birth mother or birth father??
In fact, who did I look like myself?? Would I ever know?

In 1993 I had been reading in my Bible about those long passages of names...lineages..and how important the lineage of Jesus was to the Chosen people of Israel...and US. I couldn't help but pray about it and asked God to let me know my heritage.

Finally in June, I had come to a point where I asked God to take the overwhelming desire to know my birth parents away from me and to not let me think and obsess about it again unless it was time.
For six months.

In January of 1994 my sons and I had gone away for the holidays.
Here's the miracle:
I had gone to another part of the house to be by myself when out of the blue, those thoughts hit me again...for the first time in months. Immediately I prayed and said, "God, I asked You to take these thoughts and feelings away from me until it was time..." As I turned around, a voice as clear as could be spoke to me in my right ear, "IT'S TIME"!! His voice and words brought me joy and tears. Could it really be? No more question about it now...IT WAS TIME!!!!

I looked up the phone number for the adoption agency. It was the weekend and a holiday, so I had to wait to call. It was the longest weekend of my life.
I drove back to my own home on Monday, waited until the holiday was over, and then placed a phone call to the agency about 9 or so in the morning. A lady answered the phone. Coming up with words at this point was hard. I told her my name and asked her if I could find out any kind of information at all, or even send some info just in case someone ever called looking for me.

She was so sweet. She told me that all she could do was look and see if my file contained a 'contact', basically if anyone had called within the past year looking. She would look and let me know. IF no one had made contact in the past year, she would have to look on their micro-film files and get back to me later. So I was put on hold on the phone while she went to look up my file.

You know when you are hoping, expecting something big, and you try to talk yourself out of it?? I was trying to think of the next question I would have when she told me that there had been no contact...I was still on hold thinking and trying not to be emotional when she came back on the phone.

The next words she spoke changed my life.

"Doni, are you sitting down?" "yes I replied" shaking all over......
"Your Birth mother called here three weeks ago and I was the one who spoke with her!"
I asked her, "Please, please, can you call her and let her know I've made contact too?? I want to meet her if she wants to meet me too....what do I do next???"

I couldn't believe it! Praise you Lord! You did it!

Over the next week she did call her back and my birth mother wanted to meet me too. We each had to fax signed forms to the agency and each met with a counselor. A week of JOY... The counselors set up our meeting each other..first over the phone with my birth mother calling me at a certain time.

Oh what precious hours we had talking over the phone and getting to know each other. I'll never forget it....all the questions I'd wondered about were answered.

And then we met in person. My birth mother Connie Kay drove to where I lived and arrived in the afternoon...
I remember peeking out the front door window at this pretty lady walking up to my door. Was that REALLY my very own mother????

I opened the door and we just hugged tight...for a long time....and we cried and cried. Oh what bliss to be held by my very own mother for the first time, and loved instantly just because mothers love their children. You know what...she had not been told that I was a girl when I was born, they just took me away. But she had a feeling that I was a girl all that time. I was 30 years old that special January.
I have her voice...in fact I sound just like her! I look just like her too. It was a picture she brought with her of herself at 18 that cemented it for me. I looked at the picture of her and KNEW...because I looked just like her at that age! No doubt about it.

She and I were very close for the rest of her life. There were numerous times I would pick up the phone to call her and it would ring in my hand...it was her!
Sometimes we'd just talk for hours, sometimes for just a few minutes, but it seemed like we always had to cry (we were both instantly teary when we discussed the miracle). And even though we didn't visit in person a lot, I'd have to say that we were very close. She would call me on my birthday and sing "Happy Birthday" to me in tears... and it was so special to me. She got to see my sons, her grandsons grow up.

My first card from my birth mother, just a few days after meeting for the first time.

We shared so many of the same interests.  Sewing, embroidery, crochet, etc.  Her lovely stitchworks are some of my most prized possessions.  We loved the same televisions shows and had to catch up on so many things.  She told me stories of her youth and she told me about my birth father.  I never got to meet him as he had passed away before we found each other, but someday I will see him.

This precious gift of KNOWING has made my life full and complete.  I tell people it's like I was raised on the second floor of a house that had locked doors.  I could only know the people on the second floor, not those on the first.  But I knew people I belonged to were on that first floor.  No glimpses of them were allowed and no information was given.  But when God unlocked the doors, He gave me the freedom to know, to have the answers to my questions, and the love of my mother.

I will always be grateful to my adoptive parents for raising me, taking care of me, and for the sacrifices they gave.  God placed me with them for a purpose and that purpose was fulfilled.  My love for them was never diminished just because I found my birth mother and had a relationship with her.  It's like when you have more than one child...your heart just opens up and loves more and more as each is added.  You don't loose love for the first one just because you had a second... 

The care I was shown while being raised was obvious to my birth mother as well as my birth father's families.  Each side have asked me to tell my parents that they were so thankful to them for raising me when they couldn't. 

Looking back now, at age 48, I wouldn't change a thing.  I was given a gift and I wouldn't so anything to make things different.  My birth mother was grieving over loosing me, and I was grieving not knowing her.  God healed us both with this precious gift.

My sweet birth mother passed away two years ago of cancer. I was with her for the last two weeks, staying by her side the whole time. She passed away looking at me and I will always cherish that fact. She also believed in Jesus Christ for her salvation, and that is my comfort.

"But thou art He that took me out of the womb; thou didst make me hope when I was upon my mother's breasts.
I was cast upon thee from the womb; thou art my God from my mother's belly" Psalm 22:9-10

"How great are your works O Lord, how profound your thoughts!" Psalm 92:5

"I will sing unto the Lord because He hath dealt bountifully with me." Psalm 13:6

I may not be famous, and I may not ever do anything to solve the problems in this world, but there are a few things I do know:
* Jesus really does save us from our sin which is the whole reason He died on the cross, and the faith to believe that is a gift from God. No one can change that nor earn their way to Heaven with the things they do.
* God is still doing miracles, and God bringing my birth mother into my life is one of them. Not a soul on this earth can change that or turn it into something wrong or bad however hard they might try.

My prayer is that you will be blessed by my story.  If you have any questions you may contact me via my email address (located on my profile on the right sidebar) and I will get back to you as I'm able.


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Heirloom treasures said...

Oh Doni,I was so moved by your post. What a wonderful story.I have a son your age and can't imagine what it would have been like if he had been taken from me. I am so pleased you got to know your birth mother and how beautiful she looks in the photo. Just like you in your photo. xxoo

Ceekay-THINKIN of HOME said...

Beautiful story of your life...and your birth mother. It means a lot to me.

Pat C. said...

What a lovely, heartwarming story! Thank you for sharing such a private matter with us; you'll never know how many adoptees you might have inspired to start the process of finding their birth parents--or birth parents to try to find the children they had to give up for adoption.

God bless you and your four parents!

Pat (your new "stalker" on Pinterest! *eek*)

Tea Cottage Pretties said...

Doni, this is a beautiful post and thank you for sharing. It brought tears to my eyes and I had chills reading it. How lovely and precious I am speechless. Beverly

Blessed Serendipity said...

I am so happy for you. I loved reading your story and I loved that God decided that you both should meet. I always pray that those expecting a child they cannot care for will consider letting a loving family adopt and raise their child. You are truly blessed.


Marilyn said...

Wonderful story full of love!♥♫

EllenaElizabeth said...

Doni, what a wonderful story. I'm SO glad you got to meet you birth mother and spend precious and meaningful time with her. Such a pity you never met your birth father but as you say.. one day you will. Thankyou for sharing this beautiful story. God Bless you and your family.

SwedishCorner ~ DownUnder...Pernilla said...

What a beautiful story, Doni! I'm so moved by it as I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes and also a big smile :) ~Pernilla

Jana Faith said...

Beautiful testimony. Thank you for sharing.

Coloradolady said...

What a special post! I really enjoyed this post about your life! Happy VTT

LV said...

Thanks for sharing the very touching and inspiring part of your life. I feel I have just read the best novel ever.

Bohemian said...

Oh Doni, this is one of those Testimonies that brought tears to my eyes... tear of Joy and also tears of those feelings you felt as you waited upon the Lord for His Perfect Timing and Plan! What a Beautiful Story of Hope and Faith this is... and most importantly of Love.

Blessings and more Love from the Arizona Desert... Dawn... The Bohemian

Debbie-Dabble Blog and A Debbie-Dabble Christmas said...


What a wonderful and heart felt story!
I am a firm believer that Everything happens for a reason and your whole life worked out the way it was supposed to be.
I cried when I read that your birth mother passed away while looking into your sweet face. I was the last one that my Mom looked at before she closed her eyes to this earth forever even though I was not present for her passing.
Thanks so much for sharing your story!

Many Hugs,

Pink Roses and Teacups said...

Oh Doni,

I have tears in my eyes reading your wonderful story. I am so glad you got to meet your birth mom. she was so beautiful, and as soon as I looked at the picture it reminded me of Jaqueline Kennedy!
Thanks for sharing your story.


Laura Rhodes said...

What a touching story! God was gracious to give you that gift of knowing her and being with her till the end. Thank God for His great Salvation!! Laura R.

Diann said...

What a wonderful story Doni! It just lightened my heart. Thank you for sharing at TTF and have a fun day!

Stan and Jody Gabara said...

Doni, What an inspirational story you shared on Simple & Sweet Fridays. It made me so happy that you were able to meet your mother. That's a dream come true story. Have a wonderful week!


Kerryanne @ Shabby Art Boutique said...

What an amazing and beautiful post Doni. You were truly blessed to have had the gift of wonderful adoptive parents and the joy of finally meeting your birth mother.
Thank you for sharing your story with us and for linking it to Shabbilicious Friday.

The Charm of Home said...

What a sweet story Doni. Thank you for sharing that with us! God bless you both.
Thank you for joining me at Home Sweet Home!

Ivy and Elephants said...

Doni it took me a long time to read your story. At least two hours. I wold read a few lines, have to stop to take it all in, and say a prayer each time. I absolutely love your story of how God works. My darling Sebastian is adopted and I thank God for him every day. Although he was taken away from his biological mother. I am thankful for her as well. He just turned 5 years old but I actually am looking forward to letting him know that he comes from my rather then my stomach/or the stork.

Times have changed and he will meet is biological mother within the next year or two. That story is to raw for me to tell right now, but I made a promise to my son's biological father, who never met Sebastian because he died two months before he was born. However, his bio-dad moved into my home with Sebastian. He was always there to protect his son and I so get that.

Thank you so much for sharing your story and your mother with us! Now I understand why you are just so amazing. May God continue to bless you and your family.


sarita said...

Thank you for the lovely story. I am a birth mother. In 1996 I put paperwork in with state of new jersey here my son was born. He had put paperwork in about same time. When it came to contact he decided he didn't want to. I did get letter and pics from him. He has my dads skinny legs! My heart wanted an "Oprah" reunion. One day I was crying,asking God why no reunion for me. I too heard Gods'words o clearly. He said it will be ok. Didn't say reunion.just it will be ok. Mt heart was calmed. Long story short. I'm thankful for computers! I know what a great life my son has! When ever my heart needs some info about him God provides! I'm so glad that you kno Jesus as your savior.

NickiLee said...

Hi Doni,

Thank you for sharing your story. I cried while reading every word. I related to everything you experienced as I too was given such a miracle. For 40 years I wondered who did I looked like? what was my heritage? What did my bio father look like? For years I searched every avenue - when I finally gave up my search, a miracle happened - I found him. We have a beautiful relationship ... God led us to each other when the timing was right. I've always lived my life by the saying "All in a mattero of time"

I am truly happy for you to have had a chance to share in your mothers life - I know she must have cherished every minute she got to spend with you.

Cherish your memories!
Nicki Lee

French Charmed ~ Chelle said...

What a beautiful and emotional story! I'm so glad you were able to reconnect with her. And by the way, that stork painting is magnificent. Love, love, love it. :)

Debbie-Dabble Blog and A Debbie-Dabble Christmas said...

This was such a beautiful story. I am so happy that you found your birth mother.
I used to babysit when I was a teenager for a couple who adopted 2 children. They too always told their children that they were adopted and had started and kept special albums full of pictures and wrote down their thoughts about how happy they were to have these 2 children in their lives.
I always admired them because those children grew up knowing that they were so special and very much loved by their adoptive parents.
I do not know if they looked for their birth parents as my Mom sold our family home after my Dad died and we lost contact. But I am sure that their adoptive parents helped them if they chose to do that.
Thanks for sharing your story. It is so touching!


Melanie said...

You were truly blessed to have been reunited with your birth mother Doni. She must have been jumping for joy to have found you again. Nothing in this life is by chance, God had grand plans for you didn't he. I love your story and feel very happy for you.

Pallas said...

This is a beautiful story about finding your mother. How wonderful to be able to spend time together, and be with her as she left this world. I hope you will post a picture of the wall hanging you made with both of your pictures.

Anonymous said...

Oh Doni our Father is so good!!! What a blessing to hear your story and how God brought you to meet your birth mother at the right time. He is truly an awesome redeeming Lord!!!! Yippee Jesus!

bee blessed

Anonymous said...

Such a beautiful story, Doni...God is such a loving being, we cannot fathom such love. I'm so happy you were able to bond with your mother, and what a wonderful thing to know that you still carry her around with you in your lovely sewing and art.

Going over now to comment on your terrific collage.


FlowerLady Lorraine said...

What a wonderful story about a miracle. God is awesome in how he works things out.


SarahGeorge said...

Dear Doni,

What a wonderful chance you had, to meet your birth mother! It's really great that God does things in favor of us when it is the right time. It was a blessing to read.

Jody Moreen said...

Doni- Hi- I am a fellow adoptee and love your adoptee testimony! I have a Blogger blog where I am posting Christian adoptee stories and hope I might share your story with others. Our pro-life, adoption stories can be such an encouragement to others. I have been in adoption ministry for almost 20 years and reunited with my birth siblings and encouraged others through the joys and losses in adoption. My website is http://www.adopteesanchoredinjesus@blogspot.com. Adoptees Anchored in Christ. You can e-mail me at jodymoreen@gmail.com

Jody Moreen said...

Doni- Hi- I am a fellow adoptee and love your adoptee testimony! I have a Blogger blog where I am posting Christian adoptee stories and hope I might share your story with others. Our pro-life, adoption stories can be such an encouragement to others. I have been in adoption ministry for almost 20 years and reunited with my birth siblings and encouraged others through the joys and losses in adoption. My website is http://www.adopteesanchoredinjesus@blogspot.com. Adoptees Anchored in Christ. You can e-mail me at jodymoreen@gmail.com

Stephanie Bargelski said...

You have touched me with your birth story!! I too gave up a child, a daughter. I have found her!! We live so many miles a part!! Thank You Doni!!

Louise@ElsieMayandBertha said...

Doni, I very just watched your coronation cord video with the two pictures of your ancestors and your story intrigued me (well, to be honest, I'm just nosey!)so I popped over for a read.
It's a beautiful story. You had two mother's instead of just one and it's fantastic that you were able to get to know your birth mother and her you. It was obviously meant to be.💜


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